This woman had an early life much like mine.

Once I got into middle school, I had gone from “bizarre kid who doesn’t get invited to birthday parties that often” to “the most unpopular girl in school.” I’m not exaggerating here. I was laughed at in the hallways by kids I barely knew, things were thrown at me, you name it.

I was the most unpopular boy in school during middle school. Everyone hated me. Even my previous friends nearly all abandoned me. I was just too weird, too poor, and too much of a misfit — especially for very conformist rural North Florida. I was beaten up nearly every day, my belongings stolen and even the teachers made fun of me openly. My own family members refused to acknowledge me in school if they weren’t also mocking me.

It was hell. If you want to know why I tend to be hyper-vigilant and remain at the periphery of any group, that is exactly why. Amanda Marcotte and the other middle-school-popular kids who tend to perpetrate this sort of bullying all claim it’s not a big deal (especially for boys). In fact, I believe she claimed it doesn’t even happen, particularly to boys.

But it was a big deal and it does happen. Luckily, it got better and so did I. I am fine now. But at the time, though I was never suicidal, I didn’t care if I lived or died. Which is why I won some fights I shouldn’t have and at least got a reputation for being tough (though still very much despised). It’s certainly a lot easier to prevail in a fight when you don’t care what happens to you.

I lived, made it through, and emerged into full awesomeness as an adult. Meanwhile, many of my peers who tormented me are now dead* or look like they are.

*No, I did not kill them.